I was fully aware I was in the honeymoon stage; I've experienced it before in my travels. For the first few weeks, my senses were heightened, my soul filled, my mind expanded, and my body felt more healthy and alive. Everything was sunshine and butterflies and guacamole.
Upon my arrival, I saw a healthier version of myself--a more fully alive version biking down the streets of my new neighborhood. Then, I watched as all of it was stolen from me literally overnight.
Honeymoon over.
This case of Strep was probably the nastiest sickness I've ever experienced apart from the pain and sickness surrounding my kidney stone just this past November. Two antibiotics couldn't kill it and sometimes left me feeling worse. And just as I thought it was going away, it came back in the form of tonsillitis--the same week my family arrived and the States kindly gifted its winter weather to Guadalajara.
I'm not sure how I managed to play tour guide, tourist, translator, and teacher this week, but I made it.
I lie here now, still trying to recover, trying to process, trying to glean some meaning, truth, hope, and sense of stability and purpose after a very difficult couple weeks, all the while hoping the second half of this month will be more gentle to me.
Day by day, I'm feeling better, now allowing my body to heal naturally, without medication, and thanking God that it is--not magically overnight, but slowly, steadily.
I'm still learning, "slow and steady." I'm still learning, "one day at a time," "one step at a time," and "trust me."
At this time, I don't feel like I have answers to any of my questions, or any insightful thoughts or wisdom to share. I don't know what tomorrow holds, nor what will happen and where I'll go after this internship in Mexico is over in just a couple months. But as I keep going, through transitions and "honeymoons" and disappointments and unmet desires, I'm learning this simple truth:
I'll be okay.
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I read this today and I hope it encourages you as it did me:
"Christ is building His kingdom with earth's broken things. Men want only the strong, the successful, the victorious, the unbroken, in building their kingdoms; but God is the God of the unsuccessful, of those who have failed. Heaven is filling with earth's broken lives, and there is no bruised reed that Christ cannot take and restore to glorious blessedness and beauty. He can take the life crushed by pain or sorrow and make it into a harp whose music shall be all praise. He can lift earth's saddest failure up to heaven's glory." -J.R. Miller
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